"She don't need to be out here"

Last night Miya, Ari, and I went walking around South Beach. For those of you who may not know, Memorial Day weekend is a really big deal in Miami Beach. Hundreds of thousands of people come from around the country to have a good time and pretty much every hip hop star is at some club on the beach. Well, we were running on pretty limited funds, so instead of spending money in the clubs we decided to just hang out and enjoy the action.

The ride over the MacArthur Causeway took foreverrr. Luckily the night was really breezy, so going at a snail's pace with the windows down wasn't too bad. There were some pretty interesting sights on the causeway. Of course the views of the skyline and the Port are always beautiful. Judging by the attire of the people in the surrounding cars, everyone was going to the beach for the same reason. One guy in an exceedingly lime green car from Georgia blew us a few kisses. Every so often some very...umm..."aromatic" smoke from the car next to us would waft through the windows. Slowly but surely we made it off the causeway and onto the beach. Once we were there the traffic was backed up from the causeway all the way down to Ocean Drive, where I was hoping to find a parking space. Luckily, unlike most of the tourists there I knew an alternate way to get down to Ocean Drive from the causeway. It turns out that if we had stayed with the other cars, the road would've been blocked off where we were trying to go. I usually start off looking for beach parking on 6th & Ocean. This time I didn't find a spot until the very end of the strip on 14th.

I was hoping to see at least one celebrity while we were walking around. Not too long after we got out of the car we saw Fabolous. I guess that counts for something. We also saw three people lying on the ground in handcuffs surrounded by what looked like the entire bike and foot patrol of the Miami Beach Police Department. Starting from the moment we hit the busier part of Ocean Drive and lasting throughout the night I kept getting grabbed by people. This happens sometimes out in clubs, but this was just out of control. I don't know about the rest of the girls out there, but I find this annoying. Who told you to put your hands on me?! I would like some guy to explain to me why they do this and why they think this works. Despite this the rest of the night was fun and filled with many memorable quotes sent in my direction. Here are the best from the night:

• "We got little babyface out here."
• "You're my favorite color."
• "There she is! There she is!"
• Some drunk guy walks over, blocks the sidewalk and says, "I know you!" Me: "No you don't." Him: "Oh."
• "She's so innocent. She don't need to be out here."
• "That ain't yo hair!"
• "Let me tie your shoes." Me: "I don't have laces. How will you do that?" Him: "Ya'll from England or something?"
• "What's up Cadillac Slim?"
• "You're a good girl, huh? You go to church don't you? I bet you gonna be in church tomorrow."